{"id":484,"date":"2022-09-02T11:34:13","date_gmt":"2022-09-02T11:34:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/peersupport.training\/?post_type=article&p=484"},"modified":"2023-02-05T18:27:59","modified_gmt":"2023-02-05T18:27:59","slug":"practicing-ps","status":"publish","type":"article","link":"https:\/\/peersupport.training\/is\/article\/practicing-ps\/","title":{"rendered":"5. Hagn\u00fdtt ferli"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Inngangur<\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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N\u00fa veistu eitthva\u00f0 um hva\u00f0 jafningjastu\u00f0ningur er, meginreglurnar, a\u00f0 deila s\u00f6gu \u00feinni og um hva\u00f0 jafningjastu\u00f0nings samband sn\u00fdst um. N\u00fa er komi\u00f0 a\u00f0 \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 l\u00e6ra eitthva\u00f0 um uppbyggingu jafningjastu\u00f0nings samtalsins. Eins og vi\u00f0 s\u00f6g\u00f0um \u00ed hlutanum um uppl\u00fdst \u00e1f\u00f6ll er mikilv\u00e6gt a\u00f0 vera fyrirsj\u00e1anlegur, au\u00f0mj\u00fakur og traustur. \u00de\u00fa vilt l\u00edka eiga samtal sem uppfyllir v\u00e6ntingar \u00fe\u00ednar og jafningja \u00fe\u00edns. Af \u00feeirri \u00e1st\u00e6\u00f0u bj\u00f3\u00f0um vi\u00f0 \u00fe\u00e9r fj\u00f6gurra stiga l\u00edkan til a\u00f0 skipuleggja samtali\u00f0.<\/span><\/p>\n\n \n\n

\u00deessa uppbyggingu \u00e6tti ekki a\u00f0 nota of strangt (eins og \u00ed, a\u00f0 vinna \u00ed fyrsta \u00e1fanga \u00e1 fyrsta fundi, \u00e1fanga tv\u00f6 \u00e1 \u00feeim seinni, osfrv.), \u00feetta er frekar sk\u00fdring og lei\u00f0arv\u00edsir fyrir ferla sem eiga s\u00e9r sta\u00f0 vi\u00f0 a\u00f0 mynda jafningjatengsl. Fasarnir eru sveigjanlegir og h\u00e6gt a\u00f0 nota samt\u00edmis \u00ed sumum tilvikum, e\u00f0a \u00ed annarri r\u00f6\u00f0 \u00ed \u00f6\u00f0rum. Ekki hika vi\u00f0 a\u00f0 s\u00e9rsn\u00ed\u00f0a \u00feetta bur\u00f0arvirki \u00feannig a\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 henti best \u00fe\u00ednum \u00fe\u00f6rfum og jafningja \u00fe\u00ednum. Ef \u00fea\u00f0 gerist a\u00f0 jafningi \u00feinn \u00fearf eitthva\u00f0 anna\u00f0 en fund en \u00fe\u00fa hefur skipulagt, vertu eins a\u00f0l\u00f6gunarh\u00e6fur og m\u00f6gulegt er (t.d. hefur \u00fe\u00fa \u00e6tla\u00f0 a\u00f0 r\u00e6\u00f0a bataferli jafnaldra \u00fe\u00edns en g\u00e6lud\u00fdri\u00f0 \u00feeirra d\u00f3 og \u00fea\u00f0 \u00fearf huggun \u00ed sta\u00f0inn). Manneskjur hafa tilhneigingu til a\u00f0 heg\u00f0a s\u00e9r og breg\u00f0ast vi\u00f0 \u00e1 \u00f3fyrirsj\u00e1anlegan h\u00e1tt. Vegna \u00feessa \u00feurfum vi\u00f0 a\u00f0 b\u00faa okkur undir breytingar \u00e1 sama t\u00edma og vi\u00f0 reynum a\u00f0 vi\u00f0halda nokkurn veginn \u00e1kve\u00f0num ramma um jafningjasambandi\u00f0.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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5.1 Uppbygging samtalsins<\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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Fyrir samtali\u00f0<\/h3>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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Reyndu a\u00f0 koma prakt\u00edskum hlutum \u00far vegi. \u00deetta \u00fe\u00fd\u00f0ir a\u00f0 \u00e1kve\u00f0a t\u00edma og sta\u00f0, t\u00ed\u00f0ni fundanna og hvort e\u00f0a hvernig eigi a\u00f0 vera \u00ed sambandi \u00e1 me\u00f0an. Spyr\u00f0u um hva\u00f0 myndi l\u00e1ta \u00feeim l\u00ed\u00f0a betur, en l\u00edka hva\u00f0 truflar \u00fe\u00e1; tala\u00f0u um \u00fe\u00edn eigin m\u00f6rk (\u00fe\u00fa getur lesi\u00f0 meira um heilbrig\u00f0 m\u00f6rk \u00ed kafla 2.1) og komist a\u00f0 \u00fev\u00ed hver m\u00f6rk \u00feeirra eru. Samr\u00e6\u00f0a um b\u00e6\u00f0i \u00fearfir \u00fe\u00ednar og vonir er lykilatri\u00f0i til a\u00f0 koma \u00ed veg fyrir \u00e1t\u00f6k og eiga \u00e1rangursr\u00edkar umr\u00e6\u00f0ur \u00ed framt\u00ed\u00f0inni. A\u00f0 hafa \u00feessa samninga strax \u00ed upphafi jafningjastu\u00f0ningssambands \u00fe\u00edns gefur \u00fe\u00e9r b\u00e6\u00f0i eitthva\u00f0 til a\u00f0 falla aftur \u00e1 ef einhver misskilningur e\u00f0a \u00e1greiningur \u00e6tti s\u00e9r sta\u00f0. Til d\u00e6mis vill s\u00e1 sem \u00fe\u00fa sty\u00f0ur hafa meiri t\u00edma og athygli e\u00f0a \u00fe\u00fa gleymir \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 jafnaldra \u00fe\u00ednum er mj\u00f6g \u00f3\u00fe\u00e6gilegt vi\u00f0 bakgrunnst\u00f3nlist. Vi\u00f0 getum ekki veri\u00f0 tillitss\u00f6m um eitthva\u00f0 sem vi\u00f0 vitum ekki a\u00f0 vi\u00f0 \u00e6ttum a\u00f0 taka tillit til.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n\n \n\n

\u00c1\u00f0ur en einhvers konar jafningjastu\u00f0ningstenging myndast er einnig nau\u00f0synlegt a\u00f0 f\u00e1 einhverjar uppl\u00fdsingar um hva\u00f0 s\u00e1 sem leitar hj\u00e1lpar er a\u00f0 gl\u00edma vi\u00f0. Ef \u00fe\u00fa finnur fyrir \u00f3vissu, \u00ed einhverjum skilningi, um a\u00f0 starfa sem jafningjastu\u00f0ningsma\u00f0ur, \u00fe\u00e1 er betra a\u00f0 taka skref til baka og r\u00e6\u00f0a st\u00f6\u00f0una vi\u00f0 yfirmann \u00feinn, jafningjastu\u00f0ningsf\u00e9laga e\u00f0a ge\u00f0heilbrig\u00f0iss\u00e9rfr\u00e6\u00f0ing. \u00dea\u00f0 getur gerst a\u00f0 s\u00e1 sem leitar stu\u00f0nings \u00fe\u00edns hafi vandam\u00e1l sem \u00fe\u00fa getur ekki hj\u00e1lpa\u00f0 honum me\u00f0 e\u00f0a a\u00f0 hann hafi v\u00e6ntingar sem ekki er h\u00e6gt a\u00f0 uppfylla me\u00f0 jafningjastu\u00f0ningi. Til d\u00e6mis g\u00e6ti einhver \u00e1tt von \u00e1 s\u00e9rfr\u00e6\u00f0ia\u00f0sto\u00f0 e\u00f0a daglegum stu\u00f0ningi). \u00cd sl\u00edkum tilfellum er best a\u00f0 vera hei\u00f0arlegur, bj\u00f3\u00f0a upp \u00e1 uppl\u00fdsingar um hva\u00f0 \u00fe\u00fa, sem jafningi stu\u00f0ningsma\u00f0ur, getur gert til a\u00f0 a\u00f0sto\u00f0a \u00fe\u00e1 og hva\u00f0a \u00fej\u00f3nusta og forrit eru \u00ed bo\u00f0i \u00e1 \u00fe\u00ednu sv\u00e6\u00f0i. <\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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Stig 1<\/h3>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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\u00deegar \u00fe\u00fa \u00e1tt fyrsta fund me\u00f0 jafningja er mj\u00f6g mikilv\u00e6gt a\u00f0 byrja \u00e1 \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 kynnast\n<\/span>\n\nEfni til a\u00f0 r\u00e6\u00f0a \u00e1 fyrsta fundi ykkar geta veri\u00f0:<\/span><\/p>\n

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  • Hva\u00f0 langar ykkur a\u00f0 deila um ykkur sem einstaklinga?<\/span><\/li>\n \t
  • Hva\u00f0 myndir \u00fe\u00fa vilja a\u00f0 jafninginn hj\u00e1lpi \u00fe\u00e9r me\u00f0 og hvernig \u00edmyndar \u00fe\u00fa \u00fe\u00e9r a\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 gerist?<\/span><\/li>\n \t
  • Hva\u00f0 \u00fearf \u00e9g (e\u00f0a a\u00f0rir \u00feegar \u00fe\u00fa ert \u00ed h\u00f3p) a\u00f0 vita um ykkur?<\/span><\/li>\n \t
  • Hva\u00f0 gerir \u00fe\u00fa \u00ed fr\u00edt\u00edma \u00fe\u00ednum?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\u00dea\u00f0 er mikilv\u00e6gt \u00ed \u00feessum \u00e1fanga a\u00f0 deila jafnt. \u00deannig a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00fa, sem jafningjastu\u00f0ningsma\u00f0ur, \u00e6ttir l\u00edka a\u00f0 kynna \u00feig. \u00c1 \u00feessu stigi jafningjastu\u00f0ningssambandsins er markmi\u00f0i\u00f0 a\u00f0 sj\u00e1 hvort \u00fei\u00f0, einfaldlega sem f\u00f3lk, vinni vel saman. Me\u00f0 \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 r\u00e6\u00f0a hlutlaus efni eins og upp\u00e1haldsmat, g\u00e6lud\u00fdr e\u00f0a \u00e1hugam\u00e1l er h\u00e6gt a\u00f0 f\u00e1 hugmynd um hvernig \u00fe\u00e9r l\u00ed\u00f0ur \u00ed samtali vi\u00f0 jafningja \u00feinn - er einhver \u00f3\u00fe\u00e6gindi e\u00f0a \u00e1greiningur? Ef um er a\u00f0 r\u00e6\u00f0a rifrildi e\u00f0a vandr\u00e6\u00f0i er h\u00e6gt a\u00f0 rj\u00fafa tengsl jafningja h\u00e9r \u00e1\u00f0ur en einhver d\u00fdpri og vi\u00f0kv\u00e6mari efni eru tekin upp. \u00dea\u00f0 er engin sk\u00f6mm a\u00f0 \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 velja a\u00f0 halda ekki \u00e1fram jafningjastu\u00f0ningssambandinu e\u00f0a tengjast annarri manneskju, \u00fear sem vi\u00f0 erum \u00f6ll einst\u00f6k og getum ekki s\u00e9\u00f0 fyrir hvernig tveir einstaklingar g\u00e6tu haft \u00e1hrif \u00e1 hvort anna\u00f0.\u00a0<\/span>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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    Stig 2<\/h3>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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    N\u00e6sta skref \u00ed samtali ykkar er a\u00f0 setja markmi\u00f0 fyrir tengili\u00f0 e\u00f0a ferli (fr\u00e1 fyrstu fundunum) og \u00fe\u00e1 s\u00e9rstaklega fyrir \u00feennan fund. Vi\u00f0 hverju b\u00fdst \u00fe\u00fa? Vi\u00f0 hverju b\u00fdst jafningi \u00feinn? Hva\u00f0 vill jafninginn e\u00f0a \u00fe\u00fa n\u00e1 \u00e1 fundinum ykkar? Vilji\u00f0 \u00fei\u00f0 deila um hlutlausa atbur\u00f0i e\u00f0a vill jafningi \u00feinn tala um s\u00e9rstakar minningar, reynslu e\u00f0a efni?<\/span><\/p>\n\n \n\n

    \u00dea\u00f0 er mikilv\u00e6gt a\u00f0 tala um v\u00e6ntingar \u00fe\u00ednar til fundarins \u00fev\u00ed \u00fe\u00fa vilt a\u00f0 jafningi \u00feinn \u201efari heim\u201c vonandi me\u00f0 kraftinn- tilfinninguna og\/ e\u00f0a r\u00e1\u00f0leggingarnar sem jafninginn \u00fearfnast. \u00deegar \u00fe\u00fa talar um v\u00e6ntingar samtalsins getur\u00f0u sem jafningjastu\u00f0ningsveitandi, laga\u00f0 \u00feig a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00f6rfum jafningjans.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>
    \n\n \n\nSpurningar sem \u00fe\u00fa getur r\u00e6tt eru:\u00a0<\/span>\n

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    • Hva\u00f0 viltu tala um? Hva\u00f0 er a\u00f0 gerast \u00ed l\u00edfi \u00fe\u00ednu?<\/span><\/li>\n \t
    • Hverju viltu n\u00e1 fram me\u00f0 samtalinu?<\/span><\/li>\n \t
    • Hvernig myndir \u00fe\u00fa vilja hafa samskipti um t\u00edmar?<\/span><\/li>\n \t
    • Hversu langan t\u00edma vilt \u00fe\u00fa a\u00f0 samtali\u00f0 taki?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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      Stig 3<\/h3>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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      \u00deegar \u00fe\u00fa stillir v\u00e6ntingar og markmi\u00f0 fundarins r\u00e9tt getur\u00f0u byrja\u00f0 \u00e1 samtalinu. Grunnvi\u00f0horf \u00feitt er mikilv\u00e6gt, svo \u00fei\u00f0:<\/span><\/p>

      • a. Hlusti\u00f0 hvert \u00e1 anna\u00f0, l\u00e1ttu jafningja vita a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00fa s\u00e9rt a\u00f0 hlusta me\u00f0 \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 draga saman, spyrja l\u00edtilla opinna, hei\u00f0arlegra og forvitna spurninga til a\u00f0 skilja betur. Gef\u00f0u hinum a\u00f0ilanum alla \u00fe\u00edna athygli. Komdu \u00ed veg fyrir langa einr\u00e6\u00f0u fr\u00e1 einum jafningjanna. En trufla\u00f0u \u00fe\u00f3 ekki \u00feegar \u00fea\u00f0 er ekki nau\u00f0synlegt. \u00deegar einhver talar lengi er h\u00e6gt a\u00f0 gr\u00edpa inn \u00ed me\u00f0 \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 segja til d\u00e6mis: Til a\u00f0 vera viss um a\u00f0 \u00e9g skilji \u00feig r\u00e9tt, m\u00e1 \u00e9g draga saman \u00fea\u00f0 sem \u00fe\u00fa sag\u00f0ir? E\u00f0a m\u00e1 \u00e9g spyrja \u00feig spurninga?<\/span><\/li>
      • Spyr\u00f0u spurninga (\u00fe\u00fa getur fundi\u00f0 frekari uppl\u00fdsingar um a\u00f0 mynda spurningar \u00ed kafla 6.2) og hvettu a\u00f0ra til a\u00f0 spyrja spurninga fr\u00e1 \u00fe\u00e9r, \u00fear sem \u00fea\u00f0 er sameiginleg reynsla \u00fe\u00edn sem gerir jafningjastu\u00f0ning svo \u00f3tr\u00falega s\u00e9rstakan og d\u00fdrm\u00e6tan.<\/span><\/li>
      • Gef\u00f0u r\u00e1\u00f0 \u00feegar spurt er en s\u00e6ttu \u00feig vi\u00f0 a\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 megi ekki fara eftir \u00feeim. \u00cd flestum tilfellum er s\u00e1 sem leitar s\u00e9r hj\u00e1lpar \u00ed rauninni f\u00e6r um a\u00f0 finna lausn sem hentar best fyrir a\u00f0st\u00e6\u00f0ur s\u00ednar sj\u00e1lfur, en hef\u00f0i gott af \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 r\u00e6\u00f0a \u00fea\u00f0 vi\u00f0 jafningja og f\u00e1 fullvissu um a\u00f0 \u00e1kvar\u00f0anirnar sem \u00feeir taka s\u00e9u r\u00e9ttar fyrir hann. <\/span><\/li><\/ul>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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        Stig 4<\/h3>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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        \u00de\u00f3 a\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 s\u00e9 best a\u00f0 for\u00f0ast a\u00f0 horfa st\u00f6\u00f0ugt \u00e1 klukkuna (\u00fear sem \u00feetta getur l\u00e1ti\u00f0 jafnaldra \u00feinn l\u00ed\u00f0a eins og \u00fe\u00fa hafir ekki t\u00edma fyrir \u00fe\u00e1 e\u00f0a viljir jafnvel ekki vera \u00fear), reyndu a\u00f0 vera me\u00f0vita\u00f0ur um t\u00edmann. \u00de\u00fa getur l\u00edka l\u00e1ti\u00f0 jafninja \u00feinn vita 10-15 m\u00edn\u00fatum fyrir t\u00edmann a\u00f0 fundinum l\u00fdkur flj\u00f3tlega og a\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 s\u00e9 kominn t\u00edmi til a\u00f0 byrja a\u00f0 lj\u00faka umr\u00e6\u00f0unni. \u00cd \u00feeim tilvikum \u00fear sem hugsanirnar og tilfinningarnar sem deilt er um eru mj\u00f6g s\u00e1rsaukafullar fyrir jafningja \u00feinn, mun \u00feetta gefa \u00fe\u00e9r t\u00e6kif\u00e6ri til a\u00f0 enda \u00feann hluta r\u00e6\u00f0u \u00feinnar r\u00f3lega og lei\u00f0a hana \u00ed \u00e1tt a\u00f0 l\u00e9ttari efni svo a\u00f0 vi\u00f0komandi festist ekki \u00ed \u00feessum erfi\u00f0u tilfinningum og haldi \u00e1fram a\u00f0 velta fyrir s\u00e9r. l\u00f6ngu eftir a\u00f0 samtali \u00fe\u00ednu l\u00fdkur.<\/span><\/p>

        \u00a0<\/p>

        A\u00f0 hafa litla \u201eopnunar\u201c (a\u00f0 hefja fund) og \u201eloka\u201c (loka fundi) helgisi\u00f0i eru gagnlegar til a\u00f0 skapa umgj\u00f6r\u00f0 fyrir jafningja- e\u00f0a h\u00f3pfund og draga \u00far stressinu sem fylgir \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 b\u00faa til n\u00fdjar spurningar. og umr\u00e6\u00f0uefni um hverja lotu. Hef\u00f0 getur veri\u00f0 eitthva\u00f0 l\u00edti\u00f0 - a\u00f0 bj\u00f3\u00f0a jafn\u00f6ldrum \u00fe\u00ednum \u00ed bolla af te, tala a\u00f0eins um daginn \u00feinn e\u00f0a byrja \u00e1 spurningum (\"Hvernig hefur dagurinn veri\u00f0? Hva\u00f0 hefur \u00fe\u00fa veri\u00f0 a\u00f0 gera s\u00ed\u00f0an vi\u00f0 t\u00f6lu\u00f0um saman?\"). \u00cd lok fundarins g\u00e6tir\u00f0u hugsa\u00f0 um efnin sem \u00fe\u00fa r\u00e6ddir, tryggja a\u00f0 jafningi \u00feinn viti hvernig \u00e1 a\u00f0 hafa samband vi\u00f0 \u00feig e\u00f0a skipuleggja framhaldsfund. Til a\u00f0 enda \u00e1 hressari n\u00f3tum g\u00e6tir\u00f0u spurt samtalaf\u00e9laga \u00feinn hva\u00f0 hann \u00e6tlar a\u00f0 gera \u00fea\u00f0 sem eftir er af deginum e\u00f0a hva\u00f0a skemmtilegar athafnir hann hefur skipulagt \u00ed vikunni. Eins og me\u00f0 marga \u00fe\u00e6tti jafningjastu\u00f0nings, \u00fe\u00e1 getum vi\u00f0 ekki gefi\u00f0 \u00fe\u00e9r sk\u00fdrar lei\u00f0beiningar um hvernig eigi a\u00f0 hefja og enda fundi, \u00fear sem \u00fea\u00f0 er h\u00e1\u00f0 pl\u00e1ssinu sem \u00fe\u00fa notar, m\u00f6rkunum sem \u00fe\u00fa setur og \u00fe\u00f6rfum f\u00f3lksins sem \u00fe\u00fa sty\u00f0ur.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>


        H\u00e9r eru nokkrar spurningar til a\u00f0 hj\u00e1lpa \u00fe\u00e9r a\u00f0 b\u00faa til \u00fe\u00ednar eigin jafningjastu\u00f0ningshef\u00f0ir:<\/span><\/p>

        • What would make you feel comfortable when being asked about emotionally difficult topics?<\/span><\/li>
        • H\u00e9r eru nokkrar spurningar til a\u00f0 hj\u00e1lpa \u00fe\u00e9r a\u00f0 b\u00faa til \u00fe\u00ednar eigin jafningjastu\u00f0ningshef\u00f0ir:<\/span><\/li><\/ul>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t
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          <\/div>\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t
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          Seinasti fundur <\/h3>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t
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          Jafningjastu\u00f0ningssamband getur sliti\u00f0 af m\u00f6rgum \u00e1st\u00e6\u00f0um: \u00fe\u00fa sam\u00feykktir fj\u00f6lda funda og hefur kl\u00e1ra\u00f0 \u00fe\u00e1; manneskjan sem \u00fe\u00fa hefur veri\u00f0 a\u00f0 sty\u00f0ja finnst eins og h\u00fan \u00feurfi \u00feess ekki lengur; \u00feeir eru a\u00f0 flytja burt; einum \u00fe\u00e1tttakenda finnst eins og jafningjastu\u00f0ningssambandi\u00f0 virki ekki.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

          \u00a0<\/p>

          Au\u00f0veldast er a\u00f0 halda utan um endalok sem eru skipul\u00f6g\u00f0, sem gefa \u00fe\u00e9r n\u00e6gan t\u00edma til a\u00f0 tryggja a\u00f0 b\u00fai\u00f0 s\u00e9 a\u00f0 taka \u00e1 \u00feeim \u00e1hyggjum sem jafningi \u00feinn kom til \u00fe\u00edn me\u00f0 og a\u00f0 \u00feeir fari me\u00f0 allt \u00fea\u00f0 fj\u00e1rmagn sem h\u00e6gt er til a\u00f0 halda \u00e1fram \u00e1 batalei\u00f0inni. \u00cd sl\u00edkum tilfellum er gott a\u00f0 nefna a\u00f0 jafningjastu\u00f0ningssambandi \u00fe\u00ednu er a\u00f0 lj\u00faka nokkrum fundum \u00e1\u00f0ur en lei\u00f0ir skilur \u00ed raun og veru til a\u00f0 gefa jafningjanum sem \u00fe\u00fa sty\u00f0ur t\u00edma til a\u00f0 a\u00f0lagast hugmyndinni og undirb\u00faa hana. \u00de\u00fa getur hvatt \u00fe\u00e1 til a\u00f0 spyrja hvers kyns spurninga sem \u00feeir hafa ekki enn og \u00edmynda\u00f0 s\u00e9r hva\u00f0 g\u00e6ti gerst eftir fundina \u00fe\u00edna svo a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00fa getir velt fyrir \u00fe\u00e9r m\u00f6gulegum lausnum, sj\u00e1lfum\u00f6nnunara\u00f0fer\u00f0um og \u00f6\u00f0rum stu\u00f0ningsm\u00f6guleikum (fj\u00e1rhagsa\u00f0sto\u00f0, s\u00e9rfr\u00e6\u00f0ia\u00f0sto\u00f0, sta\u00f0bundin \u00e1\u00e6tlanir og verkefni) . Markmi\u00f0i\u00f0 h\u00e9r er a\u00f0 binda enda \u00e1 jafningjastu\u00f0ningssambandi\u00f0 \u00e1 \u00feann h\u00e1tt a\u00f0 einstaklingurinn sem \u00fe\u00fa hefur hj\u00e1lpa\u00f0 upplifi sig eins undirb\u00fainn fyrir framt\u00ed\u00f0ar\u00e1skoranir og m\u00f6gulegt er.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

          \u00a0<\/p>

          Ef endirinn er mj\u00f6g skyndilegur, skilur eftir umr\u00e6\u00f0ur \u00f3kl\u00e1ra\u00f0ar og vandam\u00e1l \u00f3leyst, \u00fe\u00e1 er \u00fea\u00f0 besta sem \u00fe\u00fa getur gert a\u00f0 deila uppl\u00fdsingum og \u00farr\u00e6\u00f0um sem g\u00e6tu veri\u00f0 gagnlegar fyrir jafnaldra \u00fe\u00edna og enda fundinn \u00e1 vong\u00f3\u00f0um n\u00f3tum og \u00f3ska \u00feeim velfarna\u00f0ar.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

          \u00a0<\/p>

          Stundum rj\u00fafa samskipti \u00fe\u00edn og jafningja \u00fe\u00edns sem studd er \u00f3v\u00e6nt algj\u00f6rlega og \u00fe\u00fa hefur ekki einu sinni t\u00e6kif\u00e6ri til a\u00f0 kve\u00f0ja. \u00de\u00e1 er mikilv\u00e6gt a\u00f0 sleppa takinu.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

          \u00a0<\/p>

          \u00cd samhengi vi\u00f0 a\u00f0 sl\u00edta jafningjastu\u00f0ningssamb\u00f6nd \u00fe\u00fd\u00f0ir \u00fea\u00f0 a\u00f0 sleppa takinu a\u00f0 jafningjastu\u00f0ningsma\u00f0urinn ey\u00f0ir ekki lengur t\u00edma og orku \u00ed a\u00f0 hafa \u00e1hyggjur af, undirb\u00faa sig fyrir og tengjast \u00feeim sem hann haf\u00f0i veri\u00f0 a\u00f0 a\u00f0sto\u00f0a. Hvikar hugsanir um l\u00ed\u00f0an einhvers og s\u00e9rstakar einkenni e\u00f0a l\u00e6rd\u00f3m af \u00feeim eru algj\u00f6rlega e\u00f0lilegar, en fyrir utan \u00fea\u00f0 \u00e6ttir\u00f0u a\u00f0 halda \u00e1fram.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t

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          5.2 Hvort og hvernig skal bj\u00f3\u00f0a upp \u00e1 r\u00e1\u00f0<\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t
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          There are times when you are asked for advice, but most of the time you are not expected to give counsel, solve others\u2019 problems or lecture others on how they should live. In certain situations, it may be terribly tempting to speak up about how <\/span>you <\/span><\/i>think someone should act or think. As people that want to help others, it\u2019s natural to want to guide your peers through painful experiences that you have already lived through. Especially since, looking back, you can probably point out the mistakes you made that you want others to avoid and help them make better choices.<\/span><\/p>\n\n \n\n

          Eins og vi\u00f0 h\u00f6fum nefnt \u00e1\u00f0ur \u00e1 \u00feessu netn\u00e1mskei\u00f0i, getum vi\u00f0 hins vegar ekki undir neinum kringumst\u00e6\u00f0um vita\u00f0 til fulls um tilfinningar, hugsanir, gildi e\u00f0a markmi\u00f0 einhvers; vi\u00f0 vitum bara \u00fea\u00f0 sem okkur hefur veri\u00f0 sagt og \u00fea\u00f0 er oft bara \u00f6rl\u00edti\u00f0 af uppl\u00fdsingum um d\u00e1samlega fl\u00f3kna manneskju. \u00deess vegna er r\u00e1\u00f0gj\u00f6f eitthva\u00f0 sem \u00e6tti a\u00f0 vera vel \u00edgrunda\u00f0.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t

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          Hvernig skal bj\u00f3\u00f0a r\u00e1\u00f0?<\/i><\/b><\/p>

          • \u00cd fyrsta lagi: \u00c9g myndi segja: ekki.<\/span><\/li>
          • Ef \u00fe\u00fa ert be\u00f0inn um r\u00e1\u00f0 skaltu spyrja spurninga fyrst. Finndu \u00fat hvort jafningi \u00feinn hafi einhverjar m\u00f6gulegar lausnir \u00e1 vandam\u00e1lum s\u00ednum sem \u00feeir hafa \u00feegar fundi\u00f0 \u00fat og r\u00e6ddu kosti og galla saman. Hvettu \u00fe\u00e1 til a\u00f0 tala vi\u00f0 f\u00f3lki\u00f0 \u00ed l\u00edfi s\u00ednu sem \u00feekkir \u00fea\u00f0 vel og er kannski \u00feegar me\u00f0vita\u00f0 um \u00fea\u00f0 sem jafnaldri \u00feinn gl\u00edmir vi\u00f0. Stundum eru \u00fea\u00f0 vinir og fj\u00f6lskyldume\u00f0limir sem geta veitt d\u00fdrm\u00e6tustu inns\u00fdn \u00ed hva\u00f0 g\u00e6ti virka\u00f0 og einnig hj\u00e1lpa\u00f0 \u00e1stvinum s\u00ednum a\u00f0 taka erfi\u00f0ari \u00e1kvar\u00f0anir.\u00a0<\/span><\/li>
          • Ef jafningi segist ekki hafa eigin hugmyndir, getur\u00f0u gefi\u00f0 \u00feeim nokkrar till\u00f6gur til a\u00f0 hj\u00e1lpa \u00feeim a\u00f0 \u00ferengja hva\u00f0 hann g\u00e6ti vilja\u00f0 gera. Gakktu \u00far skugga um a\u00f0 \u00feeir viti vel a\u00f0 \u00feetta eru fr\u00e6\u00f0ilegar lausnir sem \u00fe\u00fa getur r\u00e6tt og ekki eitthva\u00f0 sem \u00feeir \u00e6ttu a\u00f0 fl\u00fdta s\u00e9r a\u00f0 fylgja.\u00a0<\/span><\/li>
          • Ef \u00fe\u00fa ert ekki be\u00f0inn um r\u00e1\u00f0 en vilt samt gefa eitthva\u00f0, spyr\u00f0u hvort jafnaldrinn s\u00e9 tilb\u00fainn a\u00f0 f\u00e1 \u00feau.<\/span><\/li><\/ul>

            Nokkrar or\u00f0alagsa\u00f0fer\u00f0ir sem \u00fe\u00fa g\u00e6tir pr\u00f3fa\u00f0 eru:\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

            • Hefur\u00f0u \u00edhuga\u00f0\u2026?\u00a0<\/span><\/li>
            • \u00deegar \u00e9g var \u00ed erfi\u00f0leikum \u2026 hj\u00e1lpa\u00f0i m\u00e9r.\u00a0<\/span><\/li>
            • Hva\u00f0 finnst \u00fe\u00e9r um\u2026? <\/span><\/li><\/ul>

              \u00a0<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>","protected":false},"featured_media":394,"parent":0,"menu_order":5,"template":"","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}}},"categories":[],"class_list":["post-484","article","type-article","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/peersupport.training\/is\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/article\/484","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/peersupport.training\/is\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/article"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/peersupport.training\/is\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/article"}],"version-history":[{"count":54,"href":"https:\/\/peersupport.training\/is\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/article\/484\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1681,"href":"https:\/\/peersupport.training\/is\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/article\/484\/revisions\/1681"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/peersupport.training\/is\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/394"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/peersupport.training\/is\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=484"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/peersupport.training\/is\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=484"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}